Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Morning Thoughts

Friends at the coffee shop
Since I live in a resort community, people continuously come and go. The winter people are going to be starting their trips back home soon.  It will be easier to get around at the Wednesday market in a few weeks. The streets will be easier to cross.

I am considered an old timer now, even though I have only been here six or seven years. I can't remember which. (I have lost track of time.)  In some towns, you aren't considered an old timer until your family has lived there for several generations.

I am used to living in resort communities. I raised my son in Santa Cruz, California and we experienced the same thing, people flowing in and out constantly. One has to remain flexible in these kinds of situations.

I remember the first time I left here for the States, my woman friend said to me with great sincerity, "Patricia, when you come back, I will still be your friend."

I asked her why she felt the need to say such a thing and her response was that many people living here full time don't take up again with their returning part time friends. Their lives have moved on and there is no room in them for the returning person.

Well, that is exactly what happened with her. When I came back, she had fallen in love and opened a restaurant and there was no time for our friendship. This is one of the pitfalls of part time friendships. Sometimes they don't make it. No one is to blame. it is just a fact of life.

I get many e mails from single retired women living in the States or Canada, complaining about being isolated and lonely. People around them and their families are working and have no time for them. I always encourage them to visit and think about moving down because it isn't like that here.

Here, there are many single women with truckloads of free time, just waiting for new friendships. Over the weekend I kept running into women friends and being invited out to a meal or coffee. I ate out several times in one day and was never alone. I couldn't have done that in the States. Walking helps because I actually can stop and talk with people. It was a beautiful weekend for me.  Now I am enjoying being at home for a few days in the peace and quiet of my little casita.  And of course with Chico by my side or sitting in my lap. He is getting older and he gets tired after running around all weekend. When we are alone, he likes to sleep.

If I am around people all the time, I lose myself. Other people's voices get stuck in my head and I can't hear my own voice.  So this is a perfect rhythm for me. Visiting with friends and then withdrawing for a few days, ebbing and flowing--- the tides of my life.


  1. Hi - I enjoyed your morning thoughts. I am making progress with my spouse on moving down there.....he says he will start sorting and getting rid of stuff. Even though I am not single, like the women you referred to, I really miss having women friends. I have been retired for three years and really miss the daily conversations with other women. So, I hope to see you later in the summer, and then VERY often if we make the move. Cross your fingers.
    Your friend,
    Pat Y.

    1. hi Pat, What wonderful news. It will be fun having you here full time. Thanks for letting me know. P