Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Morning Thoughts--An Unjust World

I haven't been writing much in my morning thoughts lately. Last time I wrote something that I thought was meaningful, that same afternoon, I saw the news about those forty three missing school boys and later on I learned that they had been murdered and their bodies burned beyond recognition. My morning thoughts didn't seem so meaningful anymore. I quit trying to take my thoughts seriously. They are just thoughts and what are thoughts? They don't change anything in the world. Violence trumps thoughts and words every time.  (In the short run.)

I am just a powerless older expat woman, living in a country that I do not understand and I cannot change. I am not even allowed to get involved in their politics. Not that I would ever have the desire to do that. I have no faith in politics or politicians. I am not out to change the world. (I can't even change the locked gate situation in my own neighborhood!)

I just want to have a simple life with my daily routines to keep me occupied. I do not want to think about students being murdered and their parents waiting for them to come home. But I have been forced to look at this reality. Violence cannot be ignored forever. If I want to continue living in Mexico, then I have to accept that things like this happen here. They happen all over the world! This is not a fair or just world. It can be cruel and evil.

My friend Marie is involved in the Course in Miracles. She believes that everything happens for a reason and there is no evil in the world. I cannot believe that.  Was it just that those students were murdered? Was it reasonable that their parents are suffering now and will suffer the rest of their lives, missing their sons?  My answer is: NO.....

I have been dealing with my disillusionment and feelings of helplessness and the unimportance of the simple life that I have created for myself in this foreign country. How do we make a difference in the face of extreme violence? How do we find meaning in our lives? My morning thoughts are just whispers in the wind. I have no answers to these questions. So I have been silent on the subject until now.

Saturday, December 6, 2014

Chico and Olive

This is the entrance to my room. Olive loves to sit there.
Sunset as seen once again from my deck.

I Am Back

I reached out for help with my computer problem and people came to my rescue. For now it is working okay. In the future if it gets bad again, I will have to invest in a new computer. But I am going to keep doing the blog as long as it works.

Yesterday I went to Cafe Magana to exchange books and videos and have lunch. Here are the photos that I took. Cafe Magana is one of my favorite places in the Lakeside area.

My lunch.

Friday, December 5, 2014

Morning Thoughts---Computer Problems

It is cold here in the mornings. Cold for us, not for you people up north. But my upstairs room is more than twenty degrees warmer than it was in my old casita downstairs. I don't know how I managed to live there all those years. Devotion to Chico and wanting to save money. I have no better excuses for living in so much discomfort. I am much happier up here where I have views on two sides and where I can take photos of the sunsets from one of my decks. I have TWO decks. I am mostly an outside person anyway so having just one room doesn't bother me. I am only one person anyway. One person, one room. Tiny house.  That is the trend these days.

I am having computer problems. I have a six year old MacBook Pro laptop. The screen keeps blacking out on me. It is extremely irritating and so I have not been on it much lately. Don't know when or if it can be fixed. If it can't be fixed, I may not buy another computer. I may just limp along with my ipad. It is the oldest model and also very difficult to use.

This may be the end of my blogging.....   I will keep trying to get it fixed but if you are missing my posts, just know that I am well and happy but my computer isn't.   I will write one more time to say goodbye if I can't get this problem fixed. Later on, if I buy a new computer, I might start up the blog again. Only time will tell at this point. Patience.

Saturday, November 29, 2014

Thanksgiving at Salvador's Restaurant

My friend Emily at the Hot Rod Restaurant
I made our reservation for three in the afternoon, hoping it wouldn't be crowded at Salvador's by then. On Canadian Thanksgiving Day it was cleared out by three. But not so on the American Thanksgiving Day. Now the expats are here for the winter.

It was so crowded that they had set a small table up right in front of the door for me and Emily. It was very noisy and people would have been streaming in and out all around our table. Cold air coming in too. It has been cold here.

So I just had to leave. I don't like noise and crowds when I am eating, no matter how good the food.  I insisted with Emily that we go upstairs to one of the other restaurants. Emily wanted to go to the Hot Rod.  I had been hoping we could have had time to eat and then go to the show. But they didn't get our food out fast enough.

I was so overwhelmed by then of the noise and problem at Salvador's that I asked Emily if she wanted to put her meal in a box and just eat it in the theater. She said no, she has seven dogs at home and cannot stay away that long. So I left her with her meal and I took mine into the theater and ate it while watching the movie. 

It was a very disappointing day. Thanksgiving, for me, is a time to be with family.  I was with my family last Thanksgiving in Portland. I miss them. But they will be down here Christmas Day. I am looking forward to celebrating the holidays then. This Thanksgiving is one for me to forget! If Emily hadn't been there, it really would have been bad.