Thinking about My Future

My friend from San Blas is leaving in a taxi today. She bought several beautiful paintings for her new home there so she couldn't go back by bus. I thought about going back with her, squeezing myself among her paintings but it is awful weather there now. Hot and sultry.

We are lucky to have such beautiful weather all year around. I decided not to visit her until December. It cools down then. Before I discovered Ajijic, I spent my winters in San Blas. Since coming here, almost five years ago, I haven't been back there. I love the beach and I also have friends there. I hope to make that trip. I just have to overcome my resistance to change in my daily routines.

Pat and I spent a lot of time talking about the changes in our lives since we first met, eleven years ago in San Blas. At that time we were both 56 years old. We had lots of energy. We both had traveled to many different places around the world.  I still thought about taking an around the world trip. I never did it and now I am afraid it is too late for a trip like that. I can't even get up enough energy to travel the seven hours it takes me to get by bus from here to San Blas.  My body tells me to slow down and not do so much.

Also, since I was robbed, I don't feel as secure as I did here. Yesterday, I spent several frantic hours trying to think of where to go instead. Maybe back to San Blas with my friend? Or maybe to another town in Mexico? Or to Thailand? Or just another town around the lake? With every option, I thought of all the downsides. The truth is, I love my life exactly the way it is now. I love everything about it, except for the robbery. And I have to look at reality. I am getting older. I am not up to traveling around the world or maybe not even around Mexico. Pat may take a trip with me in the future. But we both are happy in our daily lives.  So, why go anywhere?

I am going to Portland for a month in November to house and dog sit for my son and daughter-in-law. They are taking a two week trip to India. I used to want to go there. Not anymore. I don't like crowds.  That eliminates a lot of Countries. I love walking around town here and reading in the afternoons, taking short naps, swimming and going to the Wednesday market.

My son said to me on the phone when I was considering moving, "You have been taking photos of the same six blocks for years now."  He is right. I HAVE been doing just that.  Maybe the answer is, more short trips. Day trips, just to get me out of my complacency. I never even take the bus into Guadalajara. I could do that. There are a lot of things I could do. I just am fat and lazy........ and getting old......  Maybe I should drop in at Arden Muebles every few weeks and look at all the furniture from different exotic countries. I could sit on the strange chairs from India and pretend that I am in India, or Indonesia, or Thailand....... I am so lazy.....