Lockdown, day three

I have continued my obsessive cooking while listening to the news on my iPad.  Now there is no more room in my refrigerator. I am not sleeping much because of my mind running wild. Plus, last night my Mexican neighbors across the street had a loud, very crowded party at their house. Everyone was laughing, playing music, having fun. While I sat on my deck alone and thought about all my fears.

What is life going to be like in the future?  A five day lockdown that is only followed by a few people isn't going to stop the virus. Will there be more lockdowns? In the future, will we all have to stay home and only relate by way of computers? Sounds like a scary science fiction movie.

Maybe the Mexicans across the street have a better grasp of reality than I do. They are enjoying life and each other before it comes to an end.  The music hasn't died for them yet.  

I bring out the worst in myself. Fears become exaggerated. Every time I cough I imagine that I am going to die and I think that the end is here for me. Ugh! Maybe I should have crashed that party last night.