Morning Thoughts

I just took these photos of me. Thought I would remind readers of the face behind all these words and photos.  I usually hate having my pictures on the blog. (I am sure a psychologist would have a field day with that comment.)  I haven't been doing much writing on the blog. Mostly I have been trying to keep it alive with photos of events here.

There are times in my life when things go wrong, and usually that happens in clusters. Just as good things also seem to happen in clusters. I have learned the hard way that when I put on the negative things that are happening in my life or any negative thoughts and feelings, I get back even more negativity. But also the blog becomes very bland when I don't share much of my truth. Maybe it is time for me to take the risk again to write more of my truth and what it is like to live here. At least what it is like for ME to live here.

Many times people write to me and ask, "What is it like to live in Mexico?"  

I never know how to answer that question. I think, "Well, what is it like to live?" Also a vague question. 

I am just myself, with all of my personal quirks that would exist no matter where I lived. So trying to answer that question is impossible. What has been happening to me? At least I am well. I avoided the flu. I have been swimming again now that the holiday crowd is gone. The high season is starting to come to an end. Those are the good things. 

Bad things. There may have been a murder of an elderly expat in the house down the street from me. His son believes it was a murder. I saw the blood stain. Shocking! I doubt if the son turned it in because he had the furniture moved out in one day. He was calling in the maids.  He probably didn't want to deal with the police. That can turn into a red tape nightmare down here. 

My place has been very noisy, more than usual because people on all sides of me are building. A brick wall three stories high is going up across the alley from me.  My electric bill shot up from 50 pesos to 1750 pesos. And that may be the charge from now on. Almost my rent. So I may have to start looking for a new home. I would like to be closer to the spa but rentals out there are hard to find. The other day I told a friend that I feel squashed like a pancake with the constant noise on all sides of me. And of course that image of the blood stain will never leave my mind. Or that smell of death. 

Other than that, my dear friend and neighbor is moving to San Antonio, the next town.  Chico and I loved to walk to her house a few times a day. I am going to miss her and her two little dogs. Plus my cat seems to be on her last legs. She no longer sleeps with me. A bad sign.

Well, enough of this for today. I will swim again tomorrow and maybe my mood will lift again. I hope I don't get any negative backlash from all this negativity on my part. One thing I have finally learned is that EVERYTHING CHANGES........ tomorrow I may be feeling great and then I might delete this post. 

I used to call the way newcomers seem here as living in a pink cloud. It usually lasts several months. I was like that when I first came here. But I have been here now over ten years. I still love it. But I also experience more of the underside too. No life is perfect. And a pink cloud can't last forever.

At least, not for me. I have too much of the realist in me. I inherited that from my mother. Fortunately, my father was a dreamer. Together they made up a whole, integrated person but there were many fights as they protected their own realities. Now those different parts of my personality fight within me.